Sorry For Everything
by Crystal Snowflakes
Summary: [oneshot] Chances are that I will never see you again... He wanted you to have it... He didn’t make it. There is only one truth, and it always prevails... ...I’m sorry for everything. ShinichixRan


Sorry for Everything

By Crystal Snowflakes

Author's Notes: The other stories **will** be updated in the next couple of days, but I just had this **dying** to be written. Oh, and I do kind of have another idea for another DC fic, but that might come out after I'm finished one of the other ones, just so I don't overload myself with writing :P Anyways, enjoy!

Disclaimers: Detective Conan does not belong to me. :(

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_**Dear Ran,**_

Ran Mouri sat in the darkness, alone, her eyes slightly damp _again_from thinkingabout a certain mystery loving idiot... She brushed them away with the back of her hand, then sighed as she glanced towards Conan's room. A small, soft smile graced her face as she thought about the resemblances between the two cousins.

The acute ringing of the phone shattered the heavy silence and she was suddenly glad that her father had stayed over at a friend's... Not that it really would've mattered. He would probably have been too drunk to notice the sounds anyways. Slowly and somewhat wearily, she stood up and picked up the phone. "Mouri Detective—"

_**If you get this letter, then chances are that I will never see you again. If you haven't guessed already, I am Edogawa Conan, the child that has been living with you for the past year and a half... Of course, you'd like to ask how it happened? Then where, why, when... And finally who.**_

_...Ran._

Her eyes widened considerably, "Shinichi!" Another smile formed on her lips, but this one happier, brighter... Her eyes grew damper, if that was possible. She leaned her back against the desk as she looked out the dark gray sky, feeling a sense of depression, but brushing it away quickly as she remembered who had phoned her. "You always know just when to phone, don't you?"

He gave an edgy laugh. _Ran... I'd really love to talk with you, but... Listen to me. Please. I don't have much time._

"What is it this time?" Her eyebrows were knit tightly together in confusion, all the while wondering what had made him so nervous and caused this sudden seriousness in him. "Is there another case? If so, I'm really used to it..." She said, disappointed.

_That's not it... But... I... I might not be able to phone you again._

"Why?" Her frown deepened, "Is it because you're coming back soon?"

He sighed. He sounded so... desperate and worn. _...I can't tell you, but I just wanted to say goodbye. This is probably the last call... So... If I don't call within a few days..._

"...Shinichi, what's going on?"

_**At Tropical Land... Those two men dressed in black. Remember? I saw them do an illegal trade and they knocked me out and fed me a non-tested drug. APTX-4869. It was the worst decision of my life, to follow them, but there is nothing I can do right now... The creator of the drug is Miyano Shiho. Death only awaits those who take this drug, with the exception of only two specimens. A detective at the wrong place at the wrong time and the creator of the drug itself...**_

_...I'll try with all my might to come back... But... if I don't in a few days, stop waiting for me._ He gave a small laugh, _I'll be watching over you, Ran. And Conan, the shrimp? Don't worry if you don't see him... I asked him to come to Agasa's earlier._

"What's happening, Shinichi!" She was on the verge of being hysterical. "You sound like you're... You're on a suicide mission or something! Why can't you tell me what is going on? You leave for over a year with no explanation, then you phone me up and tell me you're probably _never going to come back_!" She shook her head furiously as tears finally leaked out of the rim and rolled down her pale cheeks. "Why can't you just tell me!"

_**...Edogawa Conan, formerly known as Kudo Shinichi. And Haibara Ai, formerly known as Miyano Shiho, or, in the Syndicate, Sherry.**_

_...It's too dangerous. Look, Ran... I've got to go._

"Shinichi! Don't you **dare** go without explaining anything!" She screamed desperately into the phone.

_I'm sorry, Ran, for everything. I'm sorry... so much more sorry than you'll ever know. Please, forgive me... For everything... I... I love you. See you later, hopefully._

Her mouth opened wide in shock and was about to yell at him when the sounds of the phone beeping reached her ears. A feeling of absolute dread filled her chest and she was suddenly aware that it might really have been the last time she would ever hear from him.

Frantic, she ran out of her house and hope that she could at least catch one last glimpse of _him_. She would yell at him, then maybe practice her karate on him for making her worry so much about him for the last year... Her hand clenched tightly. Then she'd make him explain **everything** to her. _When I get my hands on him..._

_...**If** I get my hands on him..._

She pounded on Agasa's door, only to have her knocks answered by the dreaded silence. Slowly and reluctantly, she began her walk home. The sky began to rain. The unsettling feeling in her stomach continued to haunt her, never leaving. As she finally reached her house, she collapsed on her couch, her hand tightly around the phone, hoping that Shinichi would phone her, and soon... Before she drove herself insane, preferably.

She hoped that it was a horrible joke that he was playing on her... It was bound to get him a few gigantic bumps and bruises... She hoped that he would just _phone_ her and tell her what was going on and why her life had suddenly turned around. She was hoped that she would get her answers... Especially as to why a mere seven year old was aware of his secret when she, his childhood friend, had been kept in the dark for over a year...

The darkness soon disappeared, only to be replaced with sunlight and she wondered briefly how many hours she had sat there, a phone clenched in her hands, worrying about _him** again**_.

_**The men in black are part of a dangerous syndicate... And only a few know about my secret identity and I'm telling you this... because I don't want you to be kept in the dark even after my death. Other than you, there are my parents, Agasa, Haibara, Hattori, and Jodie-sensei that knows... And before I forget, so does Kuroba Kaito, also known as Kaitou Kid, the phantom thief. I never told him... He had figured it out, and he's been a valuable ally.**_

The knocking of the door shook her out of her reverie and she stood up quickly, her hopes again filled that it was Shinichi returning. She approached the door and fully expected Shinichi to be leaning against the doorframe with his usual cool and cocky attitude. Who else _would_ knock at a time like this anyways?

_**But I need you to tell Hattori, if you get this letter, to be careful. Especially Kuroba. He's been after the organization for longer than I have... **_

As the door opened, what caught her eyes shocked her and horrified her. It was not Shinichi and it would not be what one would say a normal occurrence at the door. The floor was splattered from blood mixed with water, reddish blond hair barely able to be told apart from the sheer blood on her body and clothes. Then the head tilted upwards as blue eyes glanced at her, they were cold. It was definitely not emotions you would see in the eyes of any children.

"Mouri-san..." Her voice was raspy.

Slowly, the older girl got herself talking, "Ai-chan!" She knelt down, feeling motherly towards the young girl all of a sudden. "What's wrong? What happened to you!"

She shook her head forcefully, her breaths coming in short, painful gasps. "Listen to me, Mouri-san, and please don't interrupt. Agasa is in England right now, and he doesn't know what's been going on these days... Tell him to look in his deposit box and don't bother calling an ambulance." She winced as a bitter laugh escaped from her blood caked lips. "I won't make it, you know..." She dug her hands into her pockets and produced a letter. "Kudo-kun..." She said, quietly, as if mourning for him. "He wanted you to have it... He didn't make it. If there was any way, I wish the one lying on the ground dead was me and that he would be here right now so you could talk to him, perhaps one last time." She gave a bitter smile, "But that aside... Tell Hattori-kun and get him to tell Kuroba-kun. Tell them that Shiho said it was a trap." Smiling grimly, she pushed the bloody envelope into her hands.

"Ai-chan..." Ran was so confused. What was with this girl in front of her. What was she talking about? Kudo-kun...? Hattori-kun? Kuroba?

She cut her off, "You'll understand once you read it. You'll understand _everything_. At least I think Kudo-kun explained everything... It would be so out of his character if he didn't. He's just so predictable that way..." She coughed as blood rolled out the corner of her mouth. "Mouri-san... Please believe me when I tell you he cares, because he does... You should have seen him after he called you, so please, don't be angry at him, no matter what. He did it all for you, even if you think he was being a bastard. He did it for you because he was so utterly and pathetically in love with you." Her breathing became shorter and louder as she gave that smile of hers. A sad, bleak smile. "Mouri-san... I'm sorry for everything that has happened... I'm really...really..." She fell on her knees and collapsed, breathing so loudly, yet so quietly...

_**If you get this letter, it must mean that they have found us out... So tell Kuroba that Kudo warns him to stay low for a little while, and that I was sorry I couldn't wait for him and Hattori to come. It was too risky. I would have gone alone, except Haibara insisted on tagging along. A few days ago, she had found a lead to where the syndicate was... And here we are.**_

Ran's eyes widened in absolute horror as she scrambled towards the young girl and held her body close to hers, only to be shocked yet again. Her clothes were soaked to the bone from the blood loss and she felt revulsion towards whomever it was that made this happen. To shoot such a young and innocent child... She gasped as she felt the cloth around the stomach more soaked than all the other parts. Gritting her teeth, she lifted the shirt up slowly. A small gasp. Three bullets holes...

She watched in horror as the young girl's breathing stopped ever so slowly, then looked at her own hands... Backing up, she grabbed the phone and dialed the familiar number quickly and with a shaky voice, she told them that a dead girl by the name Haibara Ai was lying at her doorstep, dead and tortured awfully.

She then learned that another child, by the name of Edogawa Conan, was found, full of bullets, near an abandoned building, half an hour from Beika street.

_**Ran, I really don't have much time left. The reason for this letter... As I have stated before... I didn't want you to be kept in the dark, and I was tired of lying to you over and over again... After all, there is only one truth, and it always prevails. I wanted to let you know that I care about you... So please, don't be stubborn and stick your head in this problem. I couldn't stand it if I knew that it was me that had caused your death. I'm sorry for the pain I've caused. If you ever need answers, I'm sure Hattori will answer them. Ran, I love you... Please, take care...**_

_**Sayonara, Ran-neechan...**_

For the second time that night, she collapsed on her couch, and noticed the letter still in her hands. Slowly, her fingers shaking and her body trembling, she opened the envelope and unfolded the letter, her eyes starting to glaze over...

_**Kudo Shinichi and Edogawa Conan**_

_**...I'm sorry for everything.**_

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Author's Notes: Depressing, but I hope you guys liked that. :)

Crystal Snowflakes

Thursday, March 10, 2005


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